


It’s Good to See You Again

by EdgeNerd



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Drinking, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Jeremy is guilty, M/M, Michael is bitter, Trans Male Character, Trans Michael, and drunk, i guess?, maybe more like, not a good mix
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-05
Updated: 2017-07-05
Packaged: 2018-11-28 07:07:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11412801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdgeNerd/pseuds/EdgeNerd
Summary: It had been 5 years since they had seen each other, after Jeremy had called him a loser and Michael suffered in the bathroom. Now Jeremy feels guilty for the past and Michael should probably be more sober for this conversation.





	It’s Good to See You Again

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by George Salazar singing "I Don't Think Of You (It's All Good)"
> 
> Set in an au where everything is the same up until "Michael in the Bathroom". Michael got injured in the fire and never returned to school as he ended up moving away. 5 years later he and Jeremy meet up again.
> 
> I haven't written a fanfic in a long time and this is the first on Ao3
> 
> not proof read

The bitter sharp taste of the shot burned its way down Michael’s throat. Grimacing, he ordered five more despite already feeling the familiar grip of impulsion, this time to stick out his tongue just to discover its length. In front of him, the small glasses were placed and quickly downed. The bar was awash with orange light, which started to blur with every unit of alcohol he consumed. The tight pressure started to fade from his arching chest. It was almost as if his binder was not digging into his sides. He groaned with the realisation of that tomorrow morning would be heinous, knocking back another regardless. Impulsiveness slowly morphed into something else, something a lot more ugly and emotional.

Through the drunken haze, he could hear a weirdly familiar voice. The mix of emotions this voice evoked hit like a punch to the gut. At first, a pleasant warmth bloomed throughout his body starting within his intestines. Every so often a, somewhat, awkward stutter was spoken which caused the heat intensify with nostalgia and affection. However, it sounded wrong. It was too deep, too charismatic, and more smooth than uncomfortable. The way voice almost drawled deeply both chilled him and fuelled the fire, for rather different reasons. He squirmed ignoring the blush raising to his cheeks as he drained the glass and attempted to remain calm as he rose from this seat. Rushing would only draw attention to him. Not that Jeremy would notice him anyway. He stumbled away from the bar unfortunately more intoxicated than he thought. His legs tangled together and his face had a rather sudden and painful introduction to the cold hard floor.

“Michael!” Jeremy yelled in concern. He run over to the slump on the floor, leaving his order forgotten. “Are you okay?” he asked his best friend, well, ex- best friend; offering him a hand up, which Michael purposely did not take.

“You can see me?” he replied bitterly, glaring as he stood up.

“I- uhh- yeah I can” Jeremy said. Timid eyes shying away from Michael’s. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”

“I guess so” Michael responded noncommittedly, looking Jeremy up and down. It was five years they last spoke and Michael was reluctant to admit it but those years had been kind to Jeremy. He had lost the reminding traces of baby fat from his cheeks giving him sharper and more chiselled features, and he had clearly been working out, as the once gangly stick-like limbs were now pure toned muscle. Of course, that was not surprising to Michael. He would be lying if he denied to following the actor’s career and social media. He wouldn’t say that stalked Jeremy online, but others could easily accuse him of it. Despite the differences, little else had changed; his hair still looked soft and perfect for teasing in between the tips of fingers, and warm grey eyes that were reminiscent of a summer storm. A storm that had swept Michael up into sea and unknowingly had drowned him so completely, he never recovered. He never minded this; his crush never bothered him until- until- “still squiped?” he asked.

“Um- sort of. It- it’s complicated … besides I didn’t come here because of that” he changed the subject.

“Why are you here then?” Michael’s curiosity spiked.

“Your music sounded good. Urhh- from earlier, I mean” Jeremy said, not really answering the question.

“Thanks, I was thinking of giving it up awhile back but I guess I’m glad I didn’t” Michael gave a half forced (half not) smile, after all Jeremy was the reason he considered quitting. “h- How’s it hanging?” he asked, trying not to be surprised by the genuine concern in his own voice.

“Alright, I got casted as King Lear recently, I mean, I’m an actor now. I don’t know if you knew that.” Michael nodded along, as Jeremy started rambling. “Even if me an- ow- sorry, Christine and I didn’t work out” Shock filled Michael at this new knowledge which almost made miss the way Jeremy jolted in pain at his small grammatical error. “She realised she’s aroace. She helped me figure a lot of stuff including the acting thing… Michael how are you?”

“Fine” Michael knew this answer was cruel, especially in curt tone he used. However, what other answer could he give? He doubted that he would be able to lie to Jeremy.  
“Michael please, be honest. I know what I did was shitty and awful-“

“Jeremy, what do you want? All of that was a long time ago. I’m still recovering and I don’t need you reopening old wounds, okay?” his voice was starting to rising alongside his temper.

“Sor-“

“No, you don’t get to say that and walk away thinking I forgive you and any of this was okay. We were best friends, you were my player two, you said that I was your favourite person and you abandoned me for what?” he was practically screaming. No, this wasn’t what he wanted. Every time he imagined this reunion, it was never like this but his anger demanded so much. The alcohol did not help. “That night was the worse of my life, you have no clue. Did you even notice when I never returned school? Because the only person I saw in hospital was Rich. Fucking Rich! He showed more kindness after that than you did. And he’s Rich, the asshole who tormented and bullied us”

“Michae-“Jeremy’s voice was barely audible over the noisy atmosphere but the heartbroken tone still caused a stab of agony within Michael’s chest.

“No, sorry. I know it wasn’t all you.” It was true, he should have tried harder to make Jeremy see him; or he should stopped his friend from wasting money on the stupid, life-ruining pill; or never become friends in the first place. Then he would have never held Jeremy back from his dreams of popularity; or it would be better if he had never been born. His Moms would have been fine they would just adopted another child, a happy one who didn’t have to deal panic attacks, or dysphoria, or any shit he made them deal with. A child, which didn’t force them to relocate their lives over school drama. Jeremy, could have someone cooler and more supportive favourite person; or he-.

“Michael?” Oh fuck, Michael didn’t realise he was spiralling until Jeremy called out to him.

“Yeah, sorry, Jere. I’m little drunk right now” Michael told him earnestly. “Umm you didn’t answer my question.”

“Oh uhh I- I was just creeping around the internet a few weeks ago and I found your Facebook and saw you had a show tonight and I guess I just wanted to see you, see how you’re doing?”  
Jeremy hurriedly spoke. “I missed you. A lot.” He continued yet sounded unsure as if with every word he touch something broken which could shatter if he was not ridiculously careful.

Michael fidgeted with top button on his shirt. He missed his red hoodie, it was comforting, warm and felt like a 24/7 hug but Jeremy gave it to him so he burned that years ago. He had destroyed most of his stuff that day before leaving life and reminds of his and Jeremy’s relationship behind. He transferred to a different school and tried to move on but he had never succeeded, the scars were too permanent. “I miss you too”. He smiled in a small way at Jeremy who returned similar one, with little more hope.

“I can understand if you’re not ready and you can refuse and you don’t have ever forgive me but I would love be at least be able spend time with you again? But it’s up to you.”

“Okay”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna be honest, I've never gotten properly drunk before but i have been tipsy and when when I did my strongest urge was to do the tongue thing.  
> It seemed appropriate to use King Lear as both he and Jeremy got manipulated into hurting the one person who cared for them and end up in a shitty situation because of it.  
> Kind of lazy ending but i lost all inspiration, sorry


End file.
